night 177
vegas: the concerts

"He may look like he's from the projects, but I don't." - Racist African-American
male, referring to Kevin.
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The Grandest Night:
Casino: MGM Grand
Theatre: The Hollywood
Performer: Tom Jones
Tickets: $70
Drinks: Too Much

Songs We Could Recognize: My My My Delila
What's New Pussycat
Green Green Grass of Home
Gimme One Reason
It's Not Unusual

It's Your Thing
Kiss (Prince)

Final Underwear Count:
2 thongs
4 old lady panties
1 pair of gotch

Water Conservation Effort of the Night
Top Five Shows:
1. Mystere (Treasure Island)
2. "O" (Bellagio)
3. La Femme (MGM Grand)
4. Sigfried & Roy (Mirage)
5. Wayne Newton (Stardust)
Bottom Five Shows:
1. May & Murray (Imperial)
2. EFX (MGM Grand)
3. Rita Rudner (NYNY)
4. Splash (Riviera)
5. Tease (Tease Showroom)
A Closer Look At...
The Luxor

Moving Sidewalks: Yes
Elevators: Yes
Escalators: Yes
Inclinators: Yes

What's an Inclinator? Since it's a pyramid, it can't go fumbling around with a bunch of straight elevators, now can it? If you're staying anywhere between the ground floor and the penthouse, you need a way to get all of your crap to your room. Thus, the inclinator was born. It works like an elevator, only diagonally!

This hotel was definitely the coolest of cool. We'd stay here, except that whole "money" thing keeps getting in the way.

The Floor

Sex Bomb
Feb 19, later - George Clooney I understand. Brad Pitt I can understand. I could even stretch my imagination to include Ben Affleck, even though he's not really my type.

I understand that different women have different "types," I've got mine. But who describes their type as an aging Vegas crooner who's butt is starting to work it's way up his back?

Kev's ready for anything!
We had the pleasure of watching women swoon in the hundreds over the mega-star of Vegas, Tom Jones. I'll explain the show's events...but I warn you that if you're the imaginative type, you may want to read a less visual page, such as the day I cut the head off the fish.

The Subtle Seduction... Mr. Jones comes out, all respectable like, wearing a black on black suit. Not much happened. Normal singing, some smiles to the crowd. Warming up the ladies for his festival of looove.

The Start of the Weirding-Out of Me... About two songs in, Mr. Jones decides he needs to undo a few buttons. Hanging down his hairy chest is a sexy silver cross that's bigger than Mother Teresa's. He's starting to sweat.

The Gyrations of Mr. Jones... I've never seen "dancing" like this before. I don't think I can really describe it except to say it's like seeing your plaid-suited cousin get drunk at a wedding and hit on the bride's mother by trying to dance sexy to the Macarena.

The Genitals of Mr. Jones... Never in a million years would I guess that I would be discussing genitals on this site. But then, never in a million years would I think that Mr. Jones would display his through his pants quite so vividly.

Panties or bra? Which should I throw onstage?
The Crowd Reacts... They love it! The underwear flies to the stage, and the women start making their way down to the front to try to titillate him in their own special way. Most of them are young, a few are old, and one, well, one is a man. His tighty whities get thrown up there with the g-strings and again, the crowd goes wild! Tom's response: "You're ruining my image!"

Tom Jones Reacts... In true sex-icon fashion, Mr. Jones took a handful of panty, rubbed it on his face, rubbed it on his nipples (I couldn't make this stuff up, I swear!) and then tossed it back into the audience. Whew! You don't get this kinda action for seventy bucks up on Fremont!

Our tablemates Elio and Yoko from Florence enjoyed the show as much as we did!
The Final Verdict... We loved the show! It's true. Sure, we were both weirded out during many moments, but the reason we went to the show is because if anyone signifies Las Vegas, it's Tom Jones, sex creepiness and all. Once you get used to the gyrations and innuendos, it's a fabulous show!

The man's got a great voice, there's no one in Vegas who can compare. We would go back and see him anytime! Just next time, it'll be Kev throwing his boxers up there. Maybe he'll even get a room key.

baby got back...

Sing it!

Shake it!

Wiggle it!

Still got it!
more photos in the archive...

Current Location
(get out your push pins)

Las Vegas Strip

Next Stop: Hoover Dam

see the full map...

Today's Weather:
Not Unusual

Gambling Gambits
Today's Game: Roulette
Location: Luxor
Started With:$60.00
Most Cash:$112.00
Least Cash:$26.00
Left With:$26.00

Biggest Payoff:$70.00
From:$2 on 12-Red

Sleeping Quarters
Imperial Palace

Room 138. Tonight, I found my way from the hotel room to the jeep and back without getting lost once! This calls for a celebration!

Cost: $49.00

Imperial Palace
Vegas Strip
Both:Imperial Buffet

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© 2002. Kevin Beimers and Aimee Lingman. You can Leave Your Hat On.