méxico: el día trece
puerto vallarta

"Life is too short for long-term goals." -a.
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Puerto Vallarta:
Population: 250,000
Tourist Began: 1930's
High Season: Dec. - Apr.
You'll See: Beaches, Other Americans

Claim to Fame: One of the few places in Mexico where you can eat at the Outback Steakhouse.

Cerveza Grande,
Por Favor
Classic Libre Moment
Let's see how many people I can fit in the back of my truck! Don't worry about falling out, I'm sure the centrifugal force of the winding mountain roads will keep us all in! Just like swinging a bucket of sulfuric acid over your head!

Set Me Free
Febrero 10 - It's that time. The moment we've been dreading. Time to leave the nest and the comforts of our Mexican drug-lord-style vacation home, and get our asses back to our job: finding cheap entertainment in the dregs of America.

That's right. Back to the land of race car ya-yas, the land where they can't change lanes. The land where large fuzzy dice still hang proudly like... um... like... well, back to the the United States anyway.

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, getting the hell out of this country. There are only two ways to get out of this country. The Libre way or the Quota way. If this has never been explained to you before, let me take a moment of your time. I know you've got time, because you're sitting at your computer reading this web site. So that means you're either my sister or you've got a fair chunk of free time today.

Anyhoooooooooooo... libres and quotas. The libre is the free highway system through Mexico. Consider it unchanged since man invented roads. This was before man had the ability to blow up mountains and had to build the road as the mountain grows. It's the road most likely to make you toss your tortillas. The road less travelled - at least by Americans.

Road-Worthy Contest
Are we starting to see red from all these libres? It's either our imagination that one side of this road is red, or there's a reason for it.
The quota is the expensive toll road system in Mexico. It's everything you'd expect out of a highway you're paying nearly 5 bucks per hour on. I don't know how they do it, but the quotas seem to make the mountains magically disappear and you're driving on a road comparable to the Indy 500 (at a speed comparable to the Indy 500). Unfortunately, this illusion seems to have also occurred to every other driver on the road with you. But you'll be expected to swerve, speed and pass on the inside with the best of them.

On one hand, we really want to get out of Mexico fast, but on the other (the one holding the wallet) we are really quite possibly the cheapest individuals ever to walk the planet.

What did we end up choosing? The cliff-hugging, life-shortening, hairpin-turning libres or the mountain-leveling, mach-two-driving, wallet-lightening quotas? Well, if you know us at all, you should know the answer to that.

Note to Kevin: I know that this page was supposed to be about Puerto Vallarta, but each time I try to type it, I misspell it and so I have to type it a few times to get it right. This proved to be too frustrating, so I decided to change the subject of the day entirely.

Note to Aimee: Approved, on the condition that on our up and coming Honduras road trip you have to write the Tegucigalpa page.

bad photo day...

Bad photo

Bad photo

Bad photo

Half-decent photo
más fotos en el archivo...

Nuestro Sitio Ahora
Puerto Vallarta

Mañana: El Dorado

see the full map...

El Tiempo:
Breezy Palms

Las Estadísticas
Gasolina: $19.00

Hairpin Curves: 5/min

R.V. Trailer Park

Kev haggled the man with the hose down to 100 pesos, so here we are! We may be sleeping on a slab of cement, but we've got a warm swimming pool!

Cuenta: 100 pesos

Gringo John's
Caleta de Campos
K's Order:Coffee, Melon Chunks
A's Order:Coffee
Mario's Pollo
Costa de Careyes
Both:Pollo, Rico, Salada, Tortillas
Cuenta:47 pesos

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© 2002. Kevin Beimers and Aimee Lingman. Taking the libre of life.